Every decade or so, Hollywood decides the time is right to reinvent the absurd vehicle comedy. We've had runaway buses and subways and now we have Stop! That! Train!, a movie which takes an absurd premise so ludicrous a five year old could make up on the spot while eating sugary cereal and stretches it to a full ninety-eight minutes! Directed by Adam Shankman is the precise type of mid-budget studio comedy that used to dominate multiplexes on a random Friday in April. It does not attempt to rewrite the rules of high cinema, but rather to toss a wacked out mix of recognizable comic actors and fabulous drag performers onto a train going too fast and see who sweats off their makeup first before the end credits roll.
The premise is as hilariously straightforward as you'd expect. We follow a disgraced former transit authority engineer who happens to be riding a commuter train on the exact day which a bizarre computer glitch or disgruntled villain sabotage renders the breaking system completely dead. The speed maxes out overdrive, the automated controls go completely dark and the train starts tearing across a stretch of track with construction five miles on the horizon. Throw in a train car full of archetypal passengers, a troupe of quick-witted drag performers heading to a regional gig, a panicky control room crew staring at flashing red screens and a law enforcement team trying to figure out how to drop someone onto the roof from a helicopter and you've got the entire script layout! Pure, campy comfort food!
What saves the film from crashing under the sheer weight of its own silliness is the comedic momentum! Shankman has a heavy choreography background and you could tell by watching him block the slapstick within the tight confines of the train corridors. The camera glides around drag queens balancing six-inch heels while tumbling over heavy luggage, switches back to close-ups of burning brake pads under the carriages and back to the control room before any single joke gets stale. It's loud, it's deeply silly and half the physical gags on display would make a proper theater director faint on the spot, but as a piece of mindless Friday night entertainment, it gets from point A to B without losing its laugh track.
Moving on to the physical release, the disc is housed in a standard blue case and rather than the usual lazy floating-heads montage we see on so many modern releases, the cover art leans into the full B-movie absurdity; a train dramatically plummeting off a cliff with a huge fiery explosion detonating in the background while the ensemble cast, including the drag performers in glam, looks on in an awkward mix of total panic and bizarrely calm indifference to set the tone before you press play. Technically, the presentation on the Blu-ray disc is surprisingly punchy! The 1080p video transfer does a great job of handling the high-contrast lighting of the train interior showcasing loads of vibrant detail in sequins, makeup, metallic engines and frantic facial close-ups. The DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1 is what the disc truly earns its keep though! The low-end bass rumble of the train engine stays heavy and active in your subwoofer for almost the entire runtime while directional surround effects provide ample screeching metal and rushing wind whenever the comedy ventures outside the cars.
Where this release gets interesting for physical media fans is the supplement package! Studio discs for mid-budget comedies can often feel like an afterthought but the presence of a full audio commentary track and a couple of focused featurettes gives this release a little more meat on its bones than expected.
The main attraction in the special features department is the Feature Commentary with director Adam Shankman! Shankman always makes for a fun speaker on track recordings and he doesn't disappoint! If you're looking for a dry academic breakdown of film structure, you're in the wrong place. Shankman treats the track like a conversation with a friend, laughing at the sheer absurdity of certain comedic stunts and offering genuine insight on the logistics of shooting a movie set entirely on a moving platform.
Following the commentary track, the disc includes two dedicated behind-the-scenes featurettes digging into specific departments of the production. The first of these is a Production Design Featurette, running around twelve minutes and focusing on how the crew built the physical train cars on giant hydraulic gimbals. The design team breaks down the process of aging the interiors, making the commuter car worn out, spilled-on and lived-in while accommodating the elaborate wardrobe and grand stage presences of the drag cast. They also discuss building full-scale sections of the train roof with built-in safety harnesses for the performers to do practical comedic stunt work without falling thirty feet into green screen padding. It's a great appreciation of the carpenters and prop builders who built multiple identical train interiors so the crew could smash through during different takes.
The second featurette on the disc is the Director's Vision Featurette. This piece runs a little longer and focuses more on Shankman's approach to pacing a high-concept comedy. Shankman speaks about the switch between big musical numbers and physical farce, explaining how his background in dance helped him map out the physical geography of the train aisle slapstick. He breaks down pre-visualization animatics and final film cuts, showing how the original storyboards were modified on set when physical realities or impromptu jokes interfered with cool visual ideas. It's a nice look into the day to day problem-solving of mid-tier studio filmmaking, showing how directors have to improvise when time or budget constraints come into play during a hectic shoot.
All in all, Stop! That! Train! doesn't attempt to reinvent the wheel, but delivers on its promise of high-speed comedic entertainment. The Blu-ray disc provides a strong visual and acoustic presentation, backed up nicely by a solid audio commentary with Adam Shankman and a pair of featurettes that give a fun look behind the curtain. For fans of campy comedies or physical media collectors who like a disc loaded with director commentary, this release is well worth picking up for a weekend watch.
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